Kickin' It Old School

As is often the case here at the Asylum, we're gonna toss a couple of pearls in the general direction of the good folks in Milwaukee (wonder if anyone from the Motor Company actually reads these scribblings?) in the hopes of cultivating a true "open source" dialog. What the hell is "open sourcing" you ask!? Not to worry fellow Chromies, "Open Source" is just a hip tech term for taking (hopefully not stealing, that would be wrong) ideas, thoughts, concerns, and experiences from a bunch of different people (sources) and applying the best solutions to a problem.....it means listening; to your customers, your partners, just about anyone that's in your "circle of trust". And it's a pretty damn good idea...........and one I thought Harley was doing all along. Silly me.

And they really were, listening that is, even as M.H.R., HD's "marketing deity", felt compelled to step up and declare that he was bravely leading the charge into this brave new "open sourced" world. Guess we all have to impress the boss, huh M.H.R.? Now refresh my memory M.H.R., you didn't have anything to do with the Aztek debacle right? Your claim to fame was the Oprah car giveaway.......too bad about that whole "tax thing", ungrateful louts!! You got plenty of press though. Say, how's Pontiac doing these days?? Forgive me....... inside industry humor.

So how we gonna kick it old school?? By kicking it of course...........as in kick starter. How cool would that be?! Come on, you know it's true, there's something almost medieval about kicking over a hulking V-Twin using only bone, muscle and tendon. The mysterious, almost zen-like technique, handed down through the ages to only the worthy few. The inherent dangers.........we've all heard the tales of broken ankles, and worse, for the unwary; "......knew a guy once that launched himself clean over the bars!" The fact is, with every kick, we demand the beast submit to our will...........an emotion, sadly, the lowly electric starter, now matter how efficient can never evoke. Think about it, a Prius and a Corvette both get you to the same place, but really, a Prius............you see what I mean.

Not that all Harley models would, or should be so equipped with mystical lever of fire, because let's face it, kick starters are for the true believers among us........most folks will probably shy away. Although I'll bet a lot more women would opt for the kicker than one might think.......it's a domination thing, trust me on that. No, I'm thinking kick starters would be an option on maybe one or two models in the Sportster and Dyna lines (with an electric starter as back up, or when we're just feeling lazy). Special edition, "old school" renditions........stripped down, very little chrome, solo seats, mini-apes, laced wheels, "denim" paint, peanut tank for the Dyna............A bike so retro that it features a quick release front fender (major open source alert!, M.H.R., this one's for you). The fender's on when the bike's sold, but with a deft turn of a couple of quick release bolts and viola! instant badass bar hopping chopper. Weather turns nasty? Presto, chango, fender's back on and you're down the road! How sick is that!?!?

And the things gotta look the part, so the graphic package has to be unique (open source alert!), so let's work on a licensing deal with Coop, http://www.coopstuff.com/ , if you haven't seen this man's art, what the hell are you waiting for!? Just imagine a frosty devil's head on the tank with some equally sick pin striping.......very nifty indeed. He's got the "hot rod" vibe that perfectly suits a machine so old school in design that it's sporting a kick starter. It works my friends.

So what about it Harley-Davidson? Can we sack up and walk the walk when it comes to "old school"? I say put it in the moat and see if it floats........give us the choice. I'll bet a sixer there'll be enough takers to keep the bean counters happy........now about those twin cam "pan" and "shovel" motors.