Daytona Dreamin' 2012

Another spring, another Daytona Bikeweek, or was it? Yes, and well, no. To be fair your humble scribe was only able to take part in the first weekend's festivities, having to return to Texas to toil at the gig that keeps the Asylum Spawn in clothes and tuition. That's not to say this year's adventure wasn't chock full of memorable moments.........it wouldn't be Bikeweek if there weren't at least a couple of mind altering images seared into our frontal lobes.....right?

Take for instance the fact that for only the third time in history (a fact confirmed by a number of terminally annoyed bartenders and hotel staffers) Bikeweek and Spring Break converged in an unholy commingling of respective revelers. Bikers and co-eds all vying for cheap beer in the same place and the same time, oh the horror! Speaking of horror, can you imagine the following exchanges taking place on Main St?

Co-eds and Biker's?! Too much for our little friend

Two middle aged bikers (are there really any other kind?) spy a couple of cuties ambling along the avenue just up ahead, when one nudges the other and offers up, "....pretty hot, huh?" To which the other grizzled biker replies, "hey that looks like my......oh, crap....Buffy, is that you!?"

"Oh, hi daddy, hey Uncle Jim" Awkward. And you just know that happened, you know it! A lot.

On the other side of the demographic coin we have the leather clad, hard ass biker couple staggering out of Froggy's, obviously about three Jack and Cokes over their limit, when they stumble through a throng of kids just hanging out. Channeling the freewheeling vibe of their Woodstock youth, they decide to bum a couple of smokes off of the collegiate partiers. Tapping one of tomorrows taxpayers on the shoulder, the bright eyed kid whirls around and, uh oh............."mom!, dad!, oh my gawd, are you kidding me right now!?!?"

Worth every dollar!

Deeply disturbing moments aside...........a pretty routine Bikeweek. The weather was iffy (got much better after our exit, figures), rained some each day, putting a bit of a damper on the crowds at some venues. At times Main St. was actually walkable, kinda nice really. The good news? The iconic beer girls didn't dawn any rain gear......there is a God!

Can you say "project bike"?!

There was the usual mix of machines, as is a staple of Daytona. Lots of metric cruisers, low slung drag bikes, Harley's, sport bikes, and scooters. An eclectic mix to be sure, one you won't find at Sturgis, Laughlin, Street Vibrations, and Laconia. Oh, and there's those Boss Hoss V-8 freak machines. I think I've finally figured it out, those pathetic excuses for a motorcycle are the biking worlds equivalent to the lifted monster truck. Feel free to draw your own "Dr. Phil" inspired conclusions.

We spent some time with John Hamer and the good folks at Seminole Harley-Davidson. Attended a silent auction benefiting the Sam Swoope Charity Ride for Shriners Children's Hospital. Hat's off to the hundreds of riders that braved the rain, and bought some of the cool donated goodies. Great cause, even better people!

You know what else is cool about the Seminole crew? I'll tell ya, and this is totally on the down low, but it looks like Chrome Asylum is gonna get its very own XR-1200X to test, modify, and otherwise ride the hell out of. Think very long term test. More details as we decide to give 'em up........this is gonna be bitchin' fellow Chromies.



Splish, splash, James romps to a big win!



Mudfest, all in a days work for K-Dub

Went to the Supercross on Saturday night, chilled in the Dunlop suite, which was pretty handy considering it was pissing rain right up until the main. The track was pure soup, nasty and rutted, but that couldn't stop Answer's James Stewart (shameless plug, Answer is one of our exclusive brands) from engineering a flawless race and snagging the top spot on the podium, with MSR's (yup, another TR exclusive brand) K-Dub taking a well earned third.......damn good night!

But enough with the words, let's vidi some pics................



Street scene in front of world famous Froggy's





Sometimes the coolest cat is a dog





First real live Motor Maid I'd ever seen, trust me, she has more miles and is a better rider than you and me....don't doubt it

The hard working Progressive Suspension folks upgrade a very clean 95 Dyna



The reason we all make the Daytona trek, Main St.



Perfect ending to Bikeweek



Harley's Mid-Year Offering, Where's The Baggers?

Not too long ago Harley announced it's mid-year new model intros; the Softail Slim and the Sportster Seventy-Two. While both machines will no doubt find their respective niche's, their introductions raise more than a few questions. Questions that we, the inmates at the Asylum just can't resist. But before we get all "60 Minutes" (remember back when we actually believed in "investigative journalism"? I don't either.) on the Motor Company, let's take a peek under the formed metal skirts of these sexy sleds and see if they're worth a dinner and a movie.

Get your motor runnin', head out on the......

With the Sportster Seventy-Two (XL-1200V for the Harleyistas out there) we've got a nifty little time machine that catapults us back to the era of .50 gas, mini skirts, and counter-culture idiocy. From it's 2.1 gallon peanut tank, to its "ape-hanger" bars the "72" is straight out of Easy Rider central casting. It has all the looks, with none of the wretched mechanicals of a 60's chopper. And we've got to say the Milwaukee crew has really nailed it. Especially tasty are the paint options; metal flake so bold and rich it could be frosting on a kids birthday cake, or a sick rat rod inspired murdered out flat black (uh, make that "Denim Black" if you please). Flip a coin, you can't lose.

Damn Sexy

A kicked out radical (for a factory born rig) chopper stance courtesy of extended forks coupled with a skinny laced front wheel help round out the flashback styling of this pint sized bar hopper. The old school white walls are just a bonus, as is the relatively low $11,199 MSRP. Oh sure, the 72 has its limitations, not the least of which is the 2.1 gallon peanut tank, perfect for those with an inflamed prostate, but useless for long haul runs. Forget the fact that its ergonomics are more suited to staging photo shoots with hot, temperamental, inked up strippers (not that's there's anything remotely wrong with that) than actual riding........this bike flat looks sick. And you know what? Sometimes that's just enough.....and this is one of those times.

Rounding out our dynamic duo is the FLS Softail Slim. Think of it as a Fat Boy that's done some hard time with Jillian Michaels (holy crap, talk about conflicted!) coming out on the other side lean and just slightly beaten down. The newest member of the Softail family sports a relatively narrow profile front and rear, gone are the beefy rear meats, made oh so "fashionable" by the likes of the hacks at OCC (three cheers for natural selection). Instead we find a fold away license plate frame and a "bobbed" rear fender.



A low carb version of a Fat Boy


One of the most unique features of the FLS is its gloss black "Hollywood" bar, think unholy alliance of a set of motocross and roto-tiller bars and you get the jist. Honestly, they pretty cool. According to the marketing flaks at HD the styling of the bars, the slim silhouette of the bike, and a healthy dose of "dechromification" (yeah, it's a word, just don't look it up) are all supposed to conjure up memories of "home built" customs from the 40's and 50's. Maybe so, but coming off the line with it's proven Twin Cam 103B motor, available optional anti-lock brakes, lustrous paint, and $15,499 MSRP, we're thinking the Softail Slim is just a tad more, ah, shall we say refined??

So we've got two new machines, cool. What's the big deal, what's the big drama? Simple Sally, no reason to build either one. Harsh? Maybe. But here's the dope, Softails, any Softail, just aren't selling. Doesn't matter what model, they're pretty much gathering dust on the showroom floor. Check out your local dealer, do a little cub reporting and get back to me on that sport. They ain't thrilled. Same with the Sporty chopper....aren't there already about six hundred Sportster models available now? Really needed six hundred and one! No doubt HD's crack (smoking) market research team has proven through judicious applications of geometric logic that these two models are just the ticket to sales success and bonuses for all.......and management bit. Sucka! The fact is, talk to any dealer and he'll tell you what's moving..........baggers, baggers, and baggers. Simple, end of story, thank you please drive through.

Hey Milwaukee, let's build some sick hot rodded baggers sporting some serious motors, stripped down sex appeal, and slammed to the deck. While we're at it, a CVO Road Glide completely murdered out......oh baby, dare to dream........

Milwaukee Mini's To Be Born In The USA

Sharp eyed fellow Chromies will remember waaaay back in 2011 (April 11 to be exact) that we reported on a plan by the Motor Company to build the Buell Blast's replacement in the land of curry and outsourced call-centers and import them to the US badged as "real" Harley's. Ah, sorry Sally, not so fast. What a difference nearly a year makes.

While enjoying beers and brats on Main St. in Daytona I had an opportunity to chat up some folks well connected at the highest levels of Harley-Davidson (these people know what they're talking about my brothers, so much so, that I'm not free to quote them by name) and they told me that the plan to import fully assembled motorcycles from India is dead, at least in the near term. Not gonna happen, not now, maybe not ever.

So why the 180? To recap, Harley needs to develop a bike that can take over the late and unlamented Blast's role as small displacement training machine for the Rider's Edge program. The specs state that the bike needs to be no more than 500cc, which puts HD in a rather tough spot given the fact that Milwaukee's most diminutive machine crashes the party at well over 800cc's.....uh oh. Couple that with the fact that while most of the Harley Faithful are willing to accept, however grudgingly, some level of foreign content in their beloved Hogs, the notion of a machine branded with the bar and shield being built entirely overseas like some, God forbid, Honda was simply too much to swallow.

The simple truth is, the "Made in America" component of the narrative that is Harley Davidson is still sacrosanct. It's the third rail of HD brand folklore, tamper with it at your extreme peril. No matter how tempting the additional margin dollars that a foreign built would undoubtedly fetch, the suits in Milwaukee aren't willing to risk sending their loyal customer base running for the exits, a sure way to tank profits. No bonus, no bueno.

So for now, it looks like we're likely to see a petite pig coming out of the Kansas City plant sometime next year. What it'll look like is still a mystery, but we're pretty sure it will be offered in two displacements; 650cc and 500cc (the latter so it conforms to Riders Edge requirements). The key here is that it will be US built, as real a Harley as any rolling off the lines today. That's the Motor Company's story, and they're gonna stick to it, until they don't.

Daytona Bound......But In A Good Way

It's that time of year fellow Chromies, the snow's still ass deep (where it still actually snows), rain is dumping in buckets, and the wind is blowing ice daggers..........is there a better excuse to flee south with about a half-million like minded crazy ass bikers for some brew, grub, and fun!? We'd say hell no too.

All we need is a V&H Widow system and a Fuel Pak!

And this year looks to be even better. And why you query? Well John Hamer and the good folks at Seminole Harley Davidson have offered to loan me a machine to test. Not just any bike mind you, HD's very trick, but under appreciated XR-1200X. I've dug this flat track inspired hot rod since it was introduced in the states a couple of years ago. It goes, stops, and handles like a proper sport bike (OK, I'll admit any decent 600 will walk away from it. So. Who cares?), but has the heartbeat of a Milwaukee V-Twin. It just doesn't get any better my friends. You think John is trying to woo me into buying one?? Stay tuned..........

Does that look like proper riding attire to you?

We won't forget Main Street Daytona, or the Speedway either.........we'll be taking plenty of pics; the good, the bad, and the "what the f*ck, weren't there any mirrors in your hotel room" kind of candid shots. So stay tuned, stay upright, and stay frosty my fellow Chromies...........

These Kicks Are No Bull!

In the interest of full disclosure Speed and Strength is a brand owned by Tucker Rocky with whom I toil as the new VP of Marketing, but so freaking what, these new “Run With The Bulls” kicks are the best motorbiking “sneakers” I’ve ever slid on my feet. And that’s saying something given that I’m not prone to sporting anything but boots when I take old Paint Shaker out for a spin, and for good reason. Let’s just say in my youth that “I had a bad experience”, or at least damn near. Maybe you can relate, you roll up to a light, go to put your foot down, and uh oh, the laces of your Air Jordan’s just caught a grip on your shift lever……..panic!! If you’re lucky, at the last possible moment you wrestle your foot free, stab it to the ground and safe both your machine and your ego. If not? At least you’ll find out how fast you can pick up your bike in a busy intersection.

The good news? You’ll never have to worry about any “oh crap” moments with the Run With The Bull kicks, their laces are recessed and covered at the top with a handy hook and loop closure which ensure those pesky laces never ruin your day. Actually once laced, you don’t have to bother again, just use the strap closure. Another cool thing about these shoes is that the padding on the instep is just enough that the shifter won’t jab the top of your foot (a real pain if you’re out riding for the day), yet flexible enough that you can walk for miles without a worry. Of course the soles are of the “non-slip” variety. And that’s the thing, Speed and Strength has managed to cobble a shoe that works as a shoe; comfort, looks, durability, while at the same time incorporating the features that a real rider’s gonna demand. Well done.

Take that Nike, Speed and Strength's got it going on for us riders

If you’re wondering what color choices you have, you don’t. Like any proper motorcycle should, especially those of the Harley-Davidson family, these kicks come in black only, with a bit of white trim. Personally I’m hoping they throw a murdered out version in 100% mat black, ah dare to dream!

Merry Milwaukee Musings

What with Christmas right around the corner (or "the holidays" if ones PC sensibilities dictate) thoughts naturally lean toward the joy of giving and receiving of gifts. OK, more likely the receiving part, be honest now. And we here at the Asylum are not immune to such impulses, we'd love nothing more than to stick a brand new shiny scoot up every fellow Chromies chimney, but alas what with the stagnate economy and continued cuts to our formerly unlimited advertising budget new bikes for all the good little boys and girls just ain't gonna happen.

So that's it then, a lump of coal and an IRS audit!? Please.....this is the Asylum, and we're nothing if not resourceful, you know lemons, lemoncelli, that sort of thing. We've got you covered. This year we're gonna stuff your stocking with the always in style, must have gift of rumor and speculation straight from Harleyville. See, we told you not to worry.

Good news, bad news. The bad gets next....looks like my beloved XR-1200X is on the chopping block. Guess my infatuation with this nifty little machine is a lonely love affair, sales simply haven't lived up to management expectations. Truth is, the XR wasn't exactly flying out of European showrooms during it's launch year either, it's simply never got the love it deserved from the market. Damn shame, it's one of the most grin inducing Harley's you'll ever throw a leg over. If you dig the whole American V-Twin propulsion thing lovingly cradled in the most flickable package ever to emerge from the hallowed halls of the Motor Company get your butt down to your local HD man and snap one up. Because much like land and natural breasts, pretty soon they just won't make them any more.

Dude, where's my FLH? Seems that the rumors of product shortages in the touring line are more than just a little bit true. The factory flat blew it and underestimated demand for the big cross country machines. Think about that for a moment, baggers have been the meat of the market now for nearly a decade, so how do you screw that up!? Then again, when it comes to management by the "best and the brightest" recent history has shown that the titans of industry and government don't exactly have a monopoly on street smarts. How long it'll take Harley to get it right is an open question, and one their dealer network would like resolved sooner rather than later.

Loyal Chromies will remember our reporting on a forth coming Buell Blast replacement to be imported from India. Plans are still moving forward, although we learned that there have been discussions that the mini-HD could be assembled in Kansas City (deft move to avoid that whole "....tell me again, where the f**k is that thing made!? Indiana? India!?!?). That said, at the moment, it still looks like the as yet named machine is coming from the land of the sacred cow. Stay tuned.

Here's a tasty tidbit from a very trustworthy deep cover source. Seems there's a very trick, "skunk works" 750cc radical, performance oriented v-twin snuggled in the R&D vault at Juneau Ave. The hi-perf lump has been around for a while, long enough to have been bolted to what my sources tell me is an XR (as in flat tracker) inspired frame. Very cool stuff. That is until one considers the soon to be administered death blow to the current XR. There's just seems to be no appetite in the market for a really sporty Harley, or is there? What if the Motor Company went "all in" with a Duc killer sport bike, something that could fight blow for blow with the best from Bologna?? Yeah, that's just silly.

Better late than never, but better never late. It's no secret that Harley is usually tardy to the soiree when it comes to devining trends on the street and turning them into production reality. Remember the Rocker? Only about two years after that whole "OCC style" chopper cratered in the market, Harley comes out with their very own new and improved version. Thankfully, the Rocker was put out of its and our misery, my condolences to the three self-esteem challenged tools that actually bought one.

The good news is HD is actually getting out front on a couple of trends. Sound systems being one of them, the Motor Company is currently offering some truly trick upgraded stereo/speaker systems. Sure they're way over priced, and still a bit dated from a tech perspective, but they're light years ahead of where they were just a year ago. Big hoops on FLH's your thing? Nothing firm yet, but don't be surprised to see some 21 inchers (with proper load ratings and suspension geometry to match) on the big touring beasts in the not too distant future, maybe on a CVO model to start. There's simply too much profit margin being given up to the aftermarket for the factory not to jump in and get their slice of the pie, and in this case, we all score. We'll get bikes that look cool, but actually handle, with rubber designed to handle the extra heft of the FLH family of bikes. Oh, and it'll suck for the bottom feeding product liability lawyers who are happily suing the tire manufacturers and the Motor Company every time some idiot with an oversized hoop ends up on his noodle. The current crop of 21's aren't designed for FLH's........jeez.

Lastly, here's something that lands squarely on the good list, by all measures it looks like the new Dyna based Swtichback is an unqualified success. The bikes have been streaming out of the showrooms, and everyone that I know that's ridden one raves about the machine. Makes sense, the Dyna family have always been a favorite of real riders of Milwaukee iron, the guys that put on daily miles and aren't afraid to attack the random curve. As soon as we develop a relationship with a local Harley dealer (are you listening Ft Worth HD?) we'll do a complete road test.

So there it is fellow Chromies; news, clues and a rumor or two. And if you're really good, maybe the fat guy in the funny red leisure suit will drop a few more tasty tidbits down the flu.....dare to dream. 

Don't Be Hatin' Brother! We're Back!

You know what I hate? Bloggers that can't manage to post new content on a regular basis. Given the fact that the relative quality of the vast majority of blogs are mostly always in serious question, really the only redeeming value most of these hack's deliver is in the mass production and distribution of their meager prose. All we ask for is a constant stream of new "content"; perfect for consuming while waiting for a bus, being held captive in a budget meeting, or while pretending to be engaged in meaningful dialog with our significant "other". I mean really, other wise, what's the point, are these wannabe Drudge's so self-absorbed as to think folks will just keep coming back to their blogs, eagerly sniffing for even a whiff of fresh offerings? Come on, do they think there's no expiration date on "forever loyal", no matter how indifferently they treat their lowly subjects, ah, great unwashed, er, readers?! Failing to locate anything fresh, these hapless consumers of said basement dwelling tripe are left to dine on months old posts that weren't worth the effort to move a mouse in the first place. Know what I mean, don't ya just hate those guys!?

Well, there's a lot of self-loathing here at the Asylum my fellow Chromies, because yours truly has become "that guy", it's been weeks since my last post, mia culpa, I suck. And for that I humbly ask for your forgiveness. Alas my lapse while inexcusable has not been without reason. I scored a gig!! And not just any gig mind you, drum roll please.

You're now reading the lowly prose of the newly minted VP of Marketing for Tucker Rocky Inc. Yup, that Tucker Rocky, the premier distributor of all manner of powersports goodies. From jackets to helmets, tires to chains, TR's got the goods for us loony motorbikers. Great brands too; Dunlop, Arai, River Road, QuadBoss, Firstgear, Bikemaster, Answer, MSR, ProTaper, Kuryakyn, Twin Power, Yoshimura, Speed and Strength, Metal Mulisha etc., etc., etc., the list is nearly endless. The opportunity to work with a world class team,develop new and exciting brands, move to the free republic of Texas, and ride motorbikes on a regular basis was an offer that I wasn't about to refuse!

So that's why I've been AWOL, not for lack of love for you gentle Chromie, but for jumping into the deep end on a whole new adventure. So stay tuned, Chrome Asylum is back, with straight from the hip, no BS, no corporate spin, (being at TR's not gonna turn this cowboy into a spineless lackey for the man, trust me on that brother), no holds barred truth for your dining pleasure. As a matter of fact we'll be posting some tasty bits on the new Harley Switchback (didn't you read about that model here first, months ago, oh yes you did!), and our latest Sturgis adventure. You didn't think we'd pass up a chance to ride the Black Hills do ya!?

We're back baby, we are back!!