Daytona Bound......But In A Good Way

It's that time of year fellow Chromies, the snow's still ass deep (where it still actually snows), rain is dumping in buckets, and the wind is blowing ice daggers..........is there a better excuse to flee south with about a half-million like minded crazy ass bikers for some brew, grub, and fun!? We'd say hell no too.

All we need is a V&H Widow system and a Fuel Pak!

And this year looks to be even better. And why you query? Well John Hamer and the good folks at Seminole Harley Davidson have offered to loan me a machine to test. Not just any bike mind you, HD's very trick, but under appreciated XR-1200X. I've dug this flat track inspired hot rod since it was introduced in the states a couple of years ago. It goes, stops, and handles like a proper sport bike (OK, I'll admit any decent 600 will walk away from it. So. Who cares?), but has the heartbeat of a Milwaukee V-Twin. It just doesn't get any better my friends. You think John is trying to woo me into buying one?? Stay tuned..........

Does that look like proper riding attire to you?

We won't forget Main Street Daytona, or the Speedway either.........we'll be taking plenty of pics; the good, the bad, and the "what the f*ck, weren't there any mirrors in your hotel room" kind of candid shots. So stay tuned, stay upright, and stay frosty my fellow Chromies...........

These Kicks Are No Bull!

In the interest of full disclosure Speed and Strength is a brand owned by Tucker Rocky with whom I toil as the new VP of Marketing, but so freaking what, these new “Run With The Bulls” kicks are the best motorbiking “sneakers” I’ve ever slid on my feet. And that’s saying something given that I’m not prone to sporting anything but boots when I take old Paint Shaker out for a spin, and for good reason. Let’s just say in my youth that “I had a bad experience”, or at least damn near. Maybe you can relate, you roll up to a light, go to put your foot down, and uh oh, the laces of your Air Jordan’s just caught a grip on your shift lever……..panic!! If you’re lucky, at the last possible moment you wrestle your foot free, stab it to the ground and safe both your machine and your ego. If not? At least you’ll find out how fast you can pick up your bike in a busy intersection.

The good news? You’ll never have to worry about any “oh crap” moments with the Run With The Bull kicks, their laces are recessed and covered at the top with a handy hook and loop closure which ensure those pesky laces never ruin your day. Actually once laced, you don’t have to bother again, just use the strap closure. Another cool thing about these shoes is that the padding on the instep is just enough that the shifter won’t jab the top of your foot (a real pain if you’re out riding for the day), yet flexible enough that you can walk for miles without a worry. Of course the soles are of the “non-slip” variety. And that’s the thing, Speed and Strength has managed to cobble a shoe that works as a shoe; comfort, looks, durability, while at the same time incorporating the features that a real rider’s gonna demand. Well done.

Take that Nike, Speed and Strength's got it going on for us riders

If you’re wondering what color choices you have, you don’t. Like any proper motorcycle should, especially those of the Harley-Davidson family, these kicks come in black only, with a bit of white trim. Personally I’m hoping they throw a murdered out version in 100% mat black, ah dare to dream!

Merry Milwaukee Musings

What with Christmas right around the corner (or "the holidays" if ones PC sensibilities dictate) thoughts naturally lean toward the joy of giving and receiving of gifts. OK, more likely the receiving part, be honest now. And we here at the Asylum are not immune to such impulses, we'd love nothing more than to stick a brand new shiny scoot up every fellow Chromies chimney, but alas what with the stagnate economy and continued cuts to our formerly unlimited advertising budget new bikes for all the good little boys and girls just ain't gonna happen.

So that's it then, a lump of coal and an IRS audit!? Please.....this is the Asylum, and we're nothing if not resourceful, you know lemons, lemoncelli, that sort of thing. We've got you covered. This year we're gonna stuff your stocking with the always in style, must have gift of rumor and speculation straight from Harleyville. See, we told you not to worry.

Good news, bad news. The bad gets next....looks like my beloved XR-1200X is on the chopping block. Guess my infatuation with this nifty little machine is a lonely love affair, sales simply haven't lived up to management expectations. Truth is, the XR wasn't exactly flying out of European showrooms during it's launch year either, it's simply never got the love it deserved from the market. Damn shame, it's one of the most grin inducing Harley's you'll ever throw a leg over. If you dig the whole American V-Twin propulsion thing lovingly cradled in the most flickable package ever to emerge from the hallowed halls of the Motor Company get your butt down to your local HD man and snap one up. Because much like land and natural breasts, pretty soon they just won't make them any more.

Dude, where's my FLH? Seems that the rumors of product shortages in the touring line are more than just a little bit true. The factory flat blew it and underestimated demand for the big cross country machines. Think about that for a moment, baggers have been the meat of the market now for nearly a decade, so how do you screw that up!? Then again, when it comes to management by the "best and the brightest" recent history has shown that the titans of industry and government don't exactly have a monopoly on street smarts. How long it'll take Harley to get it right is an open question, and one their dealer network would like resolved sooner rather than later.

Loyal Chromies will remember our reporting on a forth coming Buell Blast replacement to be imported from India. Plans are still moving forward, although we learned that there have been discussions that the mini-HD could be assembled in Kansas City (deft move to avoid that whole "....tell me again, where the f**k is that thing made!? Indiana? India!?!?). That said, at the moment, it still looks like the as yet named machine is coming from the land of the sacred cow. Stay tuned.

Here's a tasty tidbit from a very trustworthy deep cover source. Seems there's a very trick, "skunk works" 750cc radical, performance oriented v-twin snuggled in the R&D vault at Juneau Ave. The hi-perf lump has been around for a while, long enough to have been bolted to what my sources tell me is an XR (as in flat tracker) inspired frame. Very cool stuff. That is until one considers the soon to be administered death blow to the current XR. There's just seems to be no appetite in the market for a really sporty Harley, or is there? What if the Motor Company went "all in" with a Duc killer sport bike, something that could fight blow for blow with the best from Bologna?? Yeah, that's just silly.

Better late than never, but better never late. It's no secret that Harley is usually tardy to the soiree when it comes to devining trends on the street and turning them into production reality. Remember the Rocker? Only about two years after that whole "OCC style" chopper cratered in the market, Harley comes out with their very own new and improved version. Thankfully, the Rocker was put out of its and our misery, my condolences to the three self-esteem challenged tools that actually bought one.

The good news is HD is actually getting out front on a couple of trends. Sound systems being one of them, the Motor Company is currently offering some truly trick upgraded stereo/speaker systems. Sure they're way over priced, and still a bit dated from a tech perspective, but they're light years ahead of where they were just a year ago. Big hoops on FLH's your thing? Nothing firm yet, but don't be surprised to see some 21 inchers (with proper load ratings and suspension geometry to match) on the big touring beasts in the not too distant future, maybe on a CVO model to start. There's simply too much profit margin being given up to the aftermarket for the factory not to jump in and get their slice of the pie, and in this case, we all score. We'll get bikes that look cool, but actually handle, with rubber designed to handle the extra heft of the FLH family of bikes. Oh, and it'll suck for the bottom feeding product liability lawyers who are happily suing the tire manufacturers and the Motor Company every time some idiot with an oversized hoop ends up on his noodle. The current crop of 21's aren't designed for FLH's........jeez.

Lastly, here's something that lands squarely on the good list, by all measures it looks like the new Dyna based Swtichback is an unqualified success. The bikes have been streaming out of the showrooms, and everyone that I know that's ridden one raves about the machine. Makes sense, the Dyna family have always been a favorite of real riders of Milwaukee iron, the guys that put on daily miles and aren't afraid to attack the random curve. As soon as we develop a relationship with a local Harley dealer (are you listening Ft Worth HD?) we'll do a complete road test.

So there it is fellow Chromies; news, clues and a rumor or two. And if you're really good, maybe the fat guy in the funny red leisure suit will drop a few more tasty tidbits down the flu.....dare to dream. 

Don't Be Hatin' Brother! We're Back!

You know what I hate? Bloggers that can't manage to post new content on a regular basis. Given the fact that the relative quality of the vast majority of blogs are mostly always in serious question, really the only redeeming value most of these hack's deliver is in the mass production and distribution of their meager prose. All we ask for is a constant stream of new "content"; perfect for consuming while waiting for a bus, being held captive in a budget meeting, or while pretending to be engaged in meaningful dialog with our significant "other". I mean really, other wise, what's the point, are these wannabe Drudge's so self-absorbed as to think folks will just keep coming back to their blogs, eagerly sniffing for even a whiff of fresh offerings? Come on, do they think there's no expiration date on "forever loyal", no matter how indifferently they treat their lowly subjects, ah, great unwashed, er, readers?! Failing to locate anything fresh, these hapless consumers of said basement dwelling tripe are left to dine on months old posts that weren't worth the effort to move a mouse in the first place. Know what I mean, don't ya just hate those guys!?

Well, there's a lot of self-loathing here at the Asylum my fellow Chromies, because yours truly has become "that guy", it's been weeks since my last post, mia culpa, I suck. And for that I humbly ask for your forgiveness. Alas my lapse while inexcusable has not been without reason. I scored a gig!! And not just any gig mind you, drum roll please.

You're now reading the lowly prose of the newly minted VP of Marketing for Tucker Rocky Inc. Yup, that Tucker Rocky, the premier distributor of all manner of powersports goodies. From jackets to helmets, tires to chains, TR's got the goods for us loony motorbikers. Great brands too; Dunlop, Arai, River Road, QuadBoss, Firstgear, Bikemaster, Answer, MSR, ProTaper, Kuryakyn, Twin Power, Yoshimura, Speed and Strength, Metal Mulisha etc., etc., etc., the list is nearly endless. The opportunity to work with a world class team,develop new and exciting brands, move to the free republic of Texas, and ride motorbikes on a regular basis was an offer that I wasn't about to refuse!

So that's why I've been AWOL, not for lack of love for you gentle Chromie, but for jumping into the deep end on a whole new adventure. So stay tuned, Chrome Asylum is back, with straight from the hip, no BS, no corporate spin, (being at TR's not gonna turn this cowboy into a spineless lackey for the man, trust me on that brother), no holds barred truth for your dining pleasure. As a matter of fact we'll be posting some tasty bits on the new Harley Switchback (didn't you read about that model here first, months ago, oh yes you did!), and our latest Sturgis adventure. You didn't think we'd pass up a chance to ride the Black Hills do ya!?

We're back baby, we are back!!

2012 Switchback, Harley's New "Sport Touring" Machine To Hit The Road

Move over Drudge Report, Chrome Asylum done scooped the Powersport Media. Not a particularly difficult task, I'll grant, but nonetheless, way back on May 20th we posted an article in which we speculated that based on rumblings coming out of Harley's KC plant, as well as, off the record tips from some well placed sources that Harley was fixing to introduce a new "sport touring" machine based on Dyna rolling stock.

Well sir, some snooping on the CARB website last week (thanks Ryan) revealed that the "Swtichback", a "new model" for 2012,  had been approved for sale in California. At the moment that's all we have to go on, as photos of the actual machine are about as scarce as green jobs. We'll surely keep our eyes peeled. But rest assured the Switchback is our white whale, the one truly new machine in the line-up.

In other Motor Company related news, industry insiders are telling Chrome Asylum that Harley is once again applying the screws to dealers across the country to update their stores. Can you say "great timing" Milwaukee!? It's not like unit sales haven't been slammed for the last couple of years, with many dealers only now seeing modest increases in year over year sales. And trust me, when HD "suggests" that a dealer remodel/upgrade, it's a lot like the IRS "suggesting" you pay your taxes. Best get with the program bub, or you'll find your franchise pulled faster than you can say "you're fired!"

So what's the deal here? Speculation is that Harley wants to further cull the herd and this is one way of dropping the weak. It's no secret that the Motor Company still feels the dealer network is a little too "fat", and word on the street is So Cal is a prime target for some big time thinning. Stay tuned fellow Chromies.

Flirting With Disaster, The Dangers of 21in Front Tire Conversions

I think I've just learned something that probably everyone that's passed journalism 101 already knows (pretty obvious who's had no formal journalistic training huh? Damn.), and it's this; when no one will talk to you about a story, it's probably a damn good story. And trust me, I couldn't get a peep from any of the players I sought out for an interview, I'd probably have better luck getting Anthony Weiner to guest lecture a photography class at the local junior college. OK, not true, that pathetic bastard would no doubt jump at the chance. But you gotta hand it to the powersports crowd, they can play it close to the vest and stay mum, good qualities in a friend and a bookie, but really frustrating when you're trying to get to the bottom of an issue.

Gotta admit, looks pretty cool

And that issue is? Nothing major, or so I thought, I just wanted to know what the tire folks thought about all those 21 inch conversions that are so smokin' in custom circles these days. Specifically the conversion of FLH model Harley's (which depending on year are typically shod with a 16" or 17" front hoop) from their stock configuration to 21" tires and rims. You see them everywhere, it has to be one of the top five trends in bagger customization, maybe top three. And in many cases, from a design aesthetic point of view, the conversions work well, giving the entire machine a more menacing and aggressive profile. I kinda like the look. Hell, there might have been a brief instant, fueled by more Jack and Coke than common sense, that I may have toyed with the notion for my beloved Paint Shaker. There was just one thing wrong, I knew better, see it's not about "the look", it's about the numbers. And the numbers don't add up.

For the sake of familiarity, we'll use Paint Shaker (my 2006 Harley FLHRCI) as a reference point (from '09 FLH's have 17" fronts). The '06 Road King slid off the factory line sporting Dunlop 402's; specifically an MT90B16 up front, and an MU85B16 bringing up the rear. As for maximum load, the rear is rated at 908lbs at 40lbs of pressure, while the front is rated at 783lbs at 40lbs of pressure. So far, so good. Until you begin to look for your 21" replacement for that MT90B16 that is. Now is when things really get dicey, staying with Dunlop (and why not, they make the best tires on the planet, and are OE fitment on most Harley's, so they know what's up) we'll search for our 21" inch front.

Can you imagine cleaning that wheel?

Uh oh. This isn't good. Try as I might, I couldn't find a 21 incher with a maximum load rating above 467lbs at 40lbs of pressure. That's a whopping 40% drop in max capacity. No matter how you slice it, that's significant, and in the wrong direction. Didn't matter what brand, the 21's just weren't up to the job. So I started reaching out to my friends in the tire business to get their take on the relative safety of converting an FLH to a 21" front end, just what did they think? Crickets was all I got. As you can imagine, after 20 plus years in the industry working at a retailer that at one point sold more motorcycle tires nationally than anyone, I knew just who to talk to, the folks with the answers. Trouble was, none of them was willing, or more to the point, able to talk "on the record" about the issue of 21" conversions. Not Dunlop, not Metzeler, not Michelin. Nobody. Nada. Nicht. Zilch. The fact is, liability and scum sucking accident attorney's have made cowards of us all. These guys couldn't talk, and I don't blame them, in their positions I wouldn't either.

Here's the deal, all of the manufacturers are paranoid beyond belief; we already know the 21's aren't load rated for the baggers they're getting thrown on, but that's not all. Check out any Harley forum, say http://www.cvoharley.com/ or http://www.hdforums.com/ and search around and you'll find horror stories of ill-handling bikes, owners one step away from a 5150 holding order, all because they fitted up a 21" tire, and they can't get their bikes to smooth out at anything above a walking pace. Think we might have screwed up the steering geometry Ace!? The cold hard facts are, Harley-Davidson and the tire companies (mostly Dunlop) spend countless hours and boat loads of dough ensuring that your bagger handles like Valentino was at the helm no matter what. Huge downpour? No big deal. Massive crosswind? Hardly even notice it. Rain grooves? Who cares. Board scraping cornering antics? Bring it on! In all but the most extreme situations, your badass bagger will be as well behaved as church deacon. That is if you leave it as God and the Motor Company intended. And yeah, the Motor Company wouldn't talk to me either.

Not gonna stop like a stock rig, no way

Start monkeying with steering geometry, things like rake and trail (I know you've seen those terms in the magazines, don't have a clue huh? Don't lie, most of us don't either) and unless you're some sort of suspension guru, and we know we're not, chances are trouble is just around the corner. Nine times out of ten, you're just gonna f##k it up. And until you get it sorted, the chances that you're gonna end up on your noodle are pretty good.......or not good, you get the idea. Oh, did I mention braking? Yeah, it just keeps getting better. No doubt in those very same magazines that bored you to tears with rants about the aforementioned "rake" and "trail", you might have run across the term "contact patch", it's where the rubber literally meets the road. Well sir, the contact patch on a 21" inch hoop is significantly smaller than its 16" and 17" cousins. Less patch, less grip, all things equal. This means when you need to get the beast whoa'd up in a hurry, you'll have reduced braking capacity because you've got fewer square inches of rubber "interfacing" with the blacktop. See how that might not be great? Hello Subaru.

So what's the deal, should we bag the idea of 21's on our baggers? And if so, what about customizing in general? It's our position at Chrome Asylum that you should be free to do whatever the hell you want to when it comes to modifying/customizing your ride. Period. My bucket list ride is a Sucker Punch Sally's bobber with no front brake, suicide shifter, and an open primary belt, hardly a model of NHTSA restraint and propriety. And I don't want some nanny fascist to tell me I can't have it. Just do your homework and keep your eyes open. But remember, with that freedom comes the responsibility to live with whatever consequences rear their homely heads because of the idiocy you inspired. In short, live with it. Own it, and don't sue! Don't sue anyone, they didn't hold a gun to your puppy's head and demand you fit up that 21. It was your call, if you get screwed up because of it, oh well, better luck after rehab. But sadly, that ain't the world we live in.

The fact is; the tire guys, HD (if I may be so bold), wheel manufacturers, OE dealers, independent shops and everyone else that could be bundled into a lawsuit are probably dealing with the fallout from 21" conversions as you read this. Do you really think they're aren't pending suits, please. Something tells me that ongoing litigation is the primary reason for the lack of conversation coming from the industry on this issue.

So if you still wanna slap that 21 incher under your bagger, it's totally up to you. Just know that you've surely compromised the handling, maximum load capacity and the braking performance of your motorcycle. A machine, it might be worth noting that's more likely to be overloaded and ridden two-up than its smaller, less touring oriented cousins. Your call, your risk. And if things turn to doo-doo, just remember who's idea it was. As for me? I think I'll chill and see what the Motor Company comes up with, at least I know it'll work.

Kuryakyn....is that Chinese for "poor quality"?

My old dogeared Webster paperback (yes an actual dictionary) defines "Panacea" as follows, "...n. a supposed cure for all problems". Uh ha. I'm thinking the good folks at Kuryakyn might want to go back to the drawing board when it comes to applying that moniker to their "trick" LED taillight/turn signal combo unit. I'm not sure what exactly it's curing, if anything; as mine's pretty much crapped out, after a lengthy seven whole months of service on Paint Shaker, my trusty '06 FLHRCI. I know, I know, what did I expect, that it would last forever!?

Panacea system has multiple modes, great when they work

Maybe I was asking too much, especially in light of my past experiences with "Big K's" offerings (more on that later), but the thought of bolting on a state of the art LED lighting unit, one that included a "blue dot"  (you hot rodders know what I'm talking about) and a retina searing taillight/turn signal brake light combo system that would up the odds that I would avoid the joy of an Escalade enema at the hands of Molly Multitasker, super soccer mom, was simply too much to resist. There's only one small problem. The build quality of the Panacea is so poor, that you really can't trust that its actually working. It's one thing if you can't depend on your brother-in-law, it's quite another if your brake light system takes an occasional, and altogether arbitrary powder. It could ruin your whole day.

And really, there's no excuse for it, electronics these days, at least quality stuff, is essentially bullet proof. If it works out of the box, you're good to go for years. There's simply no reason that I'm stuck taking my bike back to my dealer to deduce the failure. I'm lucky, I can roll my ride to McGuire's, and I know they'll sort it out right the first time, but many folks aren't as fortunate to have trusted mechanical help so close at hand, http://www.mcguire-hd.com/. And regardless, it's still a needless expense and hassle. I've already paid for the light once, thank you very much. 

So what you say, stuff fails all the time (Con-gress comes to mind) cut Kuryakyn some slack! Really? See, you might be right if this was an isolated incident, but it unfortunately this isn't my first rodeo with the metallic robot chick (you'll just have to trust me on that one). The Panacea lights are strike three.

Strike one on the Kuryakyn trail of tears (tortured metaphor, or brilliant turn of phrase, hmmmm!?) was a set of mirrors I bought for the CVO Springer. The design was clean and trick, which is just how they suck you in, and I thought they'd make a nifty upgrade from the rather vanilla stock units. Installation was pretty straight forward, no real issues. After a quick adjustment, off for a quick test ride. Everything was groovy, or so I thought. Sadly, it seemed that whenever the mph's exceeded 65, said mirrors would fold inward about 90 degrees, making it just a touch difficult to employ the rearviews as they were intended. Damn. Rode back to the garage, removed the mirrors, took them apart and tightened the "set" screw, as per the instructions. Back out on the road, and... Same result, folded like a busted john in Vegas. Working in the industry meant that returning defective product was no big deal, I didn't have to actually do the "dirty work" and the offending manufacturer always took the stuff back. I tried one more time with a fresh set of mirrors. You know what happened, so I won't even bore you. I will say the new HD units look great and work just dandy.

Strike two also involved the CVO Springer, this time in the form of a trick Kuryakyn axle mounted, curved license plate frame. I mean, what could possibly go wrong, right!? Flaking chrome for starters, right around the mounting screw holes. And if that weren't enough, the exposed areas quickly rusted!! This on a bike that's never seen rain, I mean it doesn't get wet when I clean the damn thing! It's my hot rod, my deuce coupe, it's pretty pampered. Well except for its crappy, rusted out license plate frame. Honestly.

So there it is, three Kuryakyn products, three pieces of crap. Baseball, life, California criminal code....whatever, no more chances. At least not from this jaded burn victim. It's sad enough that virtually nothing in the Kuryakyn catalog is made domestically, that's just a fact of life (one that we best be changing over the long haul), and many of their designs are truly well done, it's that their willingness to source quality factories in the workers paradise of the Peoples Republic is practically non-existent. The fact is, there are well made goods coming out of China, quality stuff, that performs exactly as advertised. The fact that Kuryakyn is unable, or unwilling to employ these factories is obvious and unforgivable. Too bad, I really wanna like their stuff.